Starting over...Completely Fresh.

Wow!

So I haven't blogged in months!!! Did you miss me?

Of course you did!!! Deep down inside you really really did. (:

Anyhow.....I'm changing my blog around.

I dedicated my life to health and fitness about 4 months ago.
Its been one hell of a journey. I've struggled with my confidence, weight and looks for around 3 years now. At least...that's when I noticed I had fattened up.
Prior to my weight gain, I was actually incredibly thin. Maxing out at about 5'10 180 lbs of muscle.  I was fit, and damn sexy butt ass naked.

So....I decided I would take you allll the way back....to the beginning, to update you on how i got to where i am now.

Heres my story. Ill try to keep it as short as possible.



All my life I've been very athletic. Since age 6. Sports all year long, every year, through high school. I was very physically fit and thin. During my junior year, at age 17  i tore my acl playing high school soccer. DEVASTATING!!! It was truely horrific. Life as I knew it was over. 6 month recovery period. No physical activity....lots of junk food. I gained 40 lbs. That put me at around 180lbs. As a junior that sucked balls. Eventually I recovered and was back for my senior year of soccer. I was never 100% again. I was babied that year. ..never allowed to play to my full potential, but even so, a jr college coach wanted me....but my love for soccer died my senior year. At 18 that was the first year of no sports. It was harder then I imagined....so that spring (freshmen year), I trained for my soph yr of college....hurt my knee again....had surgery....recovered in 2 months. Also....during this time....my boyfriend of 3 years dumped me. Really guy....really....so heart broken, and crippled....I pushed myself harder then I ever had. I didn't eat, I just ran. And ran.....and ran. I then tried out for the team the summer prior to sophomore year....because I was injured still and couldn't have physical contact....I didn't make it. It broke my heart. ...but I understood. That was the end of my soccer career. So...I decided id just run....A LOT. From age 19 to 23 I ran almost everyday. Stairs at the stadium.....miles and miles. I was confident, in shape, and hot. Eventually I met my current husband online. We had a lot of drama....running began to stop. I began to gain weight again. I wasn't happy with that...but I also wasn't driven anymore. I stopped caring about my looks, but on the inside I was dying....at 24  decided to stop with the self pitying....and train again....BAM! PREGNANT. Fitness was put on hold again....and I gained....and gained....and gained weight. In reality....I only gained 22 lbs. Lol. But I went from 225 to 247 post baby. I hated being 225.....so being 247 made me a whale when I wanted to weigh 170. I said my entire pregnancy, as soon as I got released, I was going crazy with fitness....6 weeks post baby...I tried one sit up cried and quit. Never tried again....not until 6 months post baby....I tried....but it was too much for me....so I quit. Life kept going....I joined my husband in Colorado Oct of last year. At that point i was 230ish lbs. But i still hated how I looked. I was miserable, depressed, and felt hideous, and untouchable....that along with other things tore us apart. So in dec...I went back to cali to live with my mom and start new. I got a job, and purchased a gym memebership....that's where my journey begins.

In following posts....I will post past experiences until I'm current. Prepare yourselves. My journey has only begun.

XoxoX